Level
3: The affects Spirituality can have
on a public national level.
My perspectives about our human physical
structures and the forces of nature that work to move us are pretty unique,
I admit. I do have my own clairvoyant
slant on things. So do you.
In my case, my findings are in part due to my absorption of hundreds
upon hundreds of psychic readings, all that I have experienced since birth,
and the knowledge I was exposed to while temporarily out of my physical form
for a drop in time. It is this inclination to interpret a situation
on a deeper level since my childhood days that has forged my adult views and
ideology. I am today because of all
that I went through and learned yesterday. (Sum Total)
Our towns and cities sprung up from the American frontier for the same
reason. We are today because of what
our forefathers’ colonized yesterday. And
they did what they did because of their own forbearers before them. We live on the continents that we do because
of the tectonic shifts that took place within the earth’s crust a millennium
ago. And so on, and so on….
Part of the process of becoming more self-aware is understanding how the physical moments of our past factor into our present frames of mind and thought patterns. The laws of cause and effect are the first primary influence. There just isn’t any way we can separate or negate our present, from our pasts. All our yesterdays do factor in. We may not be able to redirect or alter the past; this is absolutely correct. But our yesterdays do hold the value of learning from them. (Closure) This all goes back to the fundamental principles of how the maps of our four sides all interrelate and bounce off each other into forming us into the person we are at this very moment. It is these relationships that make us who we are. Part of discovering ourselves in the present is taking into account our past. (Self inventory and reflection.) Coming to spiritual restful terms with how these factors may have positively or negatively affected us, requires the understanding of how these rippling cycles were formed from the beginning.
*From pages 90-91
Spirituality versus Non-spirituality
These next chapters will be the most difficult to understand
why they were included in this first series of true-to-life examples. The
story centers on a public figure who became so detached from truth, realism
and honesty that he essentially pre-empted from his life all his own inner
feelings and those held by the people around him. Analytically deep and blunt, it will undoubtedly
be jarring to the senses at first. …
I am not out to ruin anyone. But
as a victim, I refuse to gag myself any longer just because someone else would
rather I didn’t. Those days are far, far behind me now. The object lessons and comparative study between
spirituality in contrast to non-spirituality are meant only to constructively
train a reader’s mind to better focus and accurately interpret a situation
(and/or people) on a much deeper level then what they are accustomed to doing.
Legitimate spiritualism is of such a positive force that
it’s nearly impossible to withstand becoming a more soulful, thoughtful person
for it. You can’t simultaneously make
the claim you’ve attained this concept, and not live it on a consistent daily
basis. From the moment your mind is
genuinely awakened to this deeper pulse of life, never again will your emotional
and mental outlooks put up being stifled in the paradoxes of selfish, shallowness
again. No matter how hard we may try
to convince ourselves otherwise, both natures will chafe, scream, and gnaw
until depth and honesty are allowed to return to the framework of our inner
senses again. If you live your life
with negativity, these aspects cannot be over-shadowed by the pretense of
a nice smile or pretty speech. That’s
called acting…. And what in reality
impairs our judgment from realizing what ought to be our true roles in life
with clarity of mind. People affect
each other all the time with scarce attention to how it could play out on
the lives of others and themselves; and the ramifications to both sides. It really is time we all woke up.
Note
to Reader Regarding the Crime Case:
It is in this next area of my novel that any reader’s help would be most appreciated. (See above E-book purchase link) I’ve pretty much given up the idea of solving the crime mystery which you can read excerpts from, but maybe you can….
*From pages 92, 93-95
Years ago, not unlike now, I sat
down to write another life story. The
challenge of publishing my tale posed as daunting a barrier as any gulf from
the very beginning, but that didn’t matter.
Very much like this book, I’d written it from the heart and allowed
my conscience to be its guide, too. Opposition
bombarded me at every turn due to my manuscript’s subject matter regarding
the psychological nuts and bolts that connect celebrities to their fans, and
the extents some Hollywood executives will go to maintain and foster a celebrity’s
image.
Naturally, like any other profession, there are some people
who utilize their expertise and talent in an aboveboard, positive fashion,
and some who shadily do not. My primary
story happened to fall on a set of individuals who were not so ethically inclined,
even in the event children become a part of the scene. Meant as nothing more than a benign, reflective
peek into the entertainment field to help educate parents, Stars and fans
alike, all my characters shared the same quirky pitfall which I dubbed as
The
In the course of my experiences at the hands of my main character’s
business associates, I told of some troubling facets I had uncovered about
his life’s story and the effects the state of duplicity was having upon his
personal life and career. The cloak
of secrecy he’d pulled around himself in order to hide from the world one
of his alternate natures exemplified all too well how his plan wasn’t playing
out the way it was designed to.
No one was more morally grotesque in my next-door neighbor’s
mind, Bran, than a manipulator of children. And this was precisely what he convinced himself
that the actor was attempting to deflect the world from finding out.
This outlook all started when in the later part of the 1980s,
Bran had come across the tale of a 13-year-old boy who had written a fan letter
to the actor, asking him what he ought to do about his mixed feelings over
his sexual impulses. According to the story, the actor supposedly
responded (in writing) that the boy cut his parents out of his decisions and
follow whatever his inclination led him to do….
Highly irresponsible to say the least, considering the actor didn’t
know this boy’s background or any other specifics behind the youngster’s problems.
His name was Jacob. As it turned out, Jake, to his friends, did
exactly what the letter suggested he do, and he cut his parents out of his
emotional loop. Not long after it was
suspected the boy had molested and sodomized his six-year-old little brother,
Jake killed himself…. I must tell you
that Bran admitted to me that he, himself, had never laid eyes on this so-called
signed letter from the actor. He just
knew of the boy by way of a friend who knew the family. Flimsy evidence, at best. Unconfirmed though the story was, the mere hearsay
was enough for Bran to develop a huge revulsion for this male performer.
He even claimed to know a photographer who had some photos to prove
the actor’s sexual penchant for young teenage boys, but who didn’t want to
be credited as having taken the pictures. It was to me that Bran turned to for some extra
psychic insight.
If those two items proved not convincing enough to warrant a legal investigation into the performer’s background, Bran had at his disposal a third incident involving a child.… But this story wasn’t about a young boy. It was the experience of a young eight-year-old female he personally knew of whose life circumstances were worsened by the actor’s attitude to show preference to one gender of child over another. Unlike 13-year old Jake, whose sexually confused letter had sparked an unusual amount of interest from the actor, this young girl’s simple affection went ignored and was even reacted to negatively. In contrast, all the girl had asked for from the actor was the confirmation that he’d received his birthday gift from her which had been pre-arranged with the actor’s agent well in advance. My neighbor loved this little girl dearly. So when he found out how harshly different she’d been treated, her tears of disappointment tore through Bran’s heart like no other and his mind became more convinced than ever. No amount of argument or reasonable explanation could satisfy the man. He was on a mission. Only the actor had the chance of reversing Bran’s mind. But when that didn’t happen, either, Bran’s suspicions intensified even more. By drawing the comparisons between the two opposite ways boys and girls were dealt with, Bran hoped to close the gaps of any remaining doubt about the actor’s psychological tendency to draw young homosexual boys about him. My neighbor honestly did respect all children. Once a molested child himself at the hands of an older male he’d looked up to, his need to root out child-related crimes were genuine. Don’t misunderstand, Bran had no intention of committing any illegal activity, he only wanted to reveal the performer’s inclination for what he believed it was: While females were rejected and dissuaded, boys were another matter. In his opinion, homosexual pedophilia was the secret this actor was attempting to hide and he aimed to prove it. I just couldn’t stand by and watch his foul plan unfold in the tabloids. My internal senses absolutely screamed! Child molestation is just too serious of an accusation to fling about willy-nilly without more proof than what he thought he had.
Following my own strong suspicion that pedophilia was not
the case regarding this actor, I foolishly led myself to believe that the
man ought to be warned, and got in touch with his publicist, agent, and personal
manager. Boy,
did that ever backfire against me! Because
of my decision to intervene, his publicist verbally accused me of being nothing
else but a lovelorn fan who was trying to worm her way into the performer’s
heart with a fabricated story of my own. That
wasn’t all…. In one of the phone conversations
she and I shared, I was sternly warned about the dangers of stating my neighbor’s
beliefs in writing. That included any
correspondence sent in care of her agency, as well.
She made it implicit that I would be sued for libel and slander if
by chance my information fell in the wrong hands.
“Thanks, lady!” I shot back. “I’ll be sure to try to let your client know
how you treat a person whose only motive is to stop him from being legally
charged with lewdness and child molestation!”
From then on, any updates voicing Bran’s arsenal of thoughts
were written devoid of any mention of sex and was sent certified mail, with
the added request for a return receipt. Once
I had been able to secure a link of privacy, I felt I could breathe slightly
easier. I had the ability to track
and document what was sent to whom and when. To further protect myself, I also made it very
clear to each person I was attempting to help me intervene that I had photocopies
of every single piece of correspondence. But what nonsense! I wasn’t some star-struck fan who was gunning
to find herself in this actor’s bed.... That’s why Bran had singled me out as a psychic.
He knew he could count on me for a nonbiased reading.
The only reason Bran had sought me ought to pick my brains over this
performer’s sexual behavior was because he wanted verification from what he
felt was a more reliable, outside source than what he had encountered so far
in that area of Southern California. Everyone
else was “too
“You were accused of being what, Leedee? Just some stereotypical, crazy-in-love fan?”
my neighbor screamed. “Oh, that confirms
everything!” he added. “Well, I’ll
just see how the man plans on maneuvering himself out of addressing me. A man!”
*From pages 99-101
My neighbor took the publicist’s reaction as total proof
the actor was guilty after all, and eventually set
out to contact the celeb directly. Whatever
became of Bran and his attempt to personally confront the actor, I don’t know.
Not long after he moved to
That experience taught me a lot about the way these business
people oversee
Not long after my manuscript landed in the hands of a less-than-honest
literary agent not more than 18 months later, my world would be rocked to
its very core into making sure the details never became public knowledge.
Because I was the mother of three young children known to
essentially no one and visibly not married any longer, the task wasn’t very
hard to accomplish. All someone had
to do was to have me come home with my children in tow to a burglarized, ransacked
apartment. Nothing was stolen; only
three parting gifts were left behind, instead, to mark the occurrence. My first gift was a typed message threatening
my kids’ safety if I published. The
second drove the point further by deliberately strangling my children’s pet
kitten dead, leaving him to be found hanging by the monitor that bore the
message. My third surprise was the
unexpected bonus of having my head shoved into a wall. All the appropriate authorities were called
in and police reports filed, naturally, but no solid correlation between my
book and the performer could be legally pinned down. Although the exact connection would not be revealed
for many years, all the authorities I spoke to concurred that there was definitely
something about my book’s character he wanted kept tightly hidden.
Alone again to secure my children’s future, I moved us as far away
as I could to escape the air of threat left looming over our heads and boxed
away the publishing contract I’d been sent by an interested Publisher but
never returned. I dared not take the chance. The crime remains unsolved….
Message
as it appeared on my monitor screen. The
cat was hung directly beneath the screen and a broken doll left on the keyboard
beside both. See photos (minus our
pet).
Get this straight bitch
Forget the idea of publishing
that crap book of yours and burn those post office receipts, or it will be your kids room that will be gotten
into next time. Sleep well. Don’t forget to kiss them all pleasant good
nights mother.
There’d been some verses included in that first manuscript, too. You might recall having read one of them earlier on. It’s the poem “A Mother’s Song” on page 70. The lines where I write “When I tuck them in bed – When I kiss them good night” are a bit hair raising now, aren’t they? Now imagine what further damage this does to children when they learn for themselves the threatening message left typed on my computer monitor for everyone to read. The unwarranted killing of their pet and the element of a broken-faced doll lying next to both only terrorized them more.
Meanwhile, mom turned to every quadrant she could find for
help. The idea that the people responsible
hadn’t been found and locked away from harming other families didn’t at all
set well with me. I even wrote to the
celebrity personally, twice, since the general consensus was that he was innocent
of any involvement and would have been crazy to approve such an extreme measure
from anyone in his world, no matter how important the privacy issue or great
his angst toward me personally. But
very few had been privy about the contents of my manuscript. Outside of a handful, the remaining suspects
were exclusively those surrounding the performer. Specifically; his then agent, publicist, manager,
and personal assistant that he had surrounding him from 1990 to 1993.
… Here’s where the stark blades
of reality ruled supreme. Without any hardcore evidence to go on, nothing
could be proven. But everybody knew
from which sector of the world the order originated from anyhow, and where
a motive did exist. The contents of my manuscript proved at least that much.
Pre-edited and still in its revision stages though it was,
the text nonetheless showcased those same (registered mail) delivery receipts
identifying all the same people and performer one at a time. (As shown in green.) The piece of information that cinched
common sense into linking these parties together, however, took place when
the performer’s legal counsel admitted to Sheriff Deputies their offices had
been made aware of my book some time before. Guess who it was confirmed spilled the beans?
To believe that the agent had meant to cause me any sort of personal
harm is too outrageous to even contemplate, of course.
I absolutely make no such charge. More
than likely he was only trying to verify my story before committing himself
to a response. What is significant
is how the knowledge that he placed the call narrowed the band of focus on
the same specific group my manuscript had referenced.
It certainly did not escape attention that the exact list of people
whose actions I had related so negatively, were now the only other human beings
in the world who’d been given the heads up about it. From 1200 miles away, Bran hadn’t even a clue.
Once Bran’s whereabouts had been confirmed and all other
leads had been ruled out from my side of the fence, all work on my case came
to a grinding halt. Without more concrete
fact or supporting testimony to go on, no detective was willing to put his
badge on the line to go any further than placing a few out-of-city phone calls.
They can’t be blamed. Names mean money, money means power and clout.
You figure the rest….
Entirely abandoned to my own devices now, I honestly didn’t
know who else to turn to for help with the crime except for the one man who
I knew was on a first-name basis with the four remaining suspects in question.
The actor…. After reading my manuscript as part of his investigation,
the sheriff’s detective assigned to the case couldn’t help but agree.
Somebody felt threatened over my book and the vulnerable position it
equally put the actor in by way of association was unquestionably evident.
But who...? Even though
my story hadn’t painted the actor in a bad light at all, no one else stood
more to be embarrassed about over its publication than he did, as the central
character. There was no doubt that
someone had hired out the job to find the pieces of evidence that I’d used
to display some very elite Hollywood names in full view. Without them, there wasn’t any proof to substantiate
any claim at all about anyone.
No one expected the actor thrill over the prospect of joining
in, but for the sake and safety of three children, no one thought it unreasonable
he make an effort, either. Emphasizing
my belief in his innocence, I nearly begged the man, providing him with the
same materials I’d willingly turned over to law deputies, and the gravity of his assistance as the only living
common denominator who could possibly supply investigators a clue. Big mistake…. The guy didn’t even acknowledge
my family and I were alive. Nope, not
even through the same attorney I’d (confidentially) addressed my correspondence
in care of. Why the actor and his
attorney chose never to respond or blink in my direction when I had made it
very clear I would agree to any terms that either one wanted to set, remains
a mystery.
Here’s the irony of it all. Ten years later in a full and unabashed media fanfare, the same figure confessed out loud the precise category of public distortions my book had once grazed in order to wipe the slate of his life clean…. What of his addressing the crime committed on his behalf and for the sake of this “super-secret”, while he was at it? Nothing doing. In spite of numerous attempts and many a heartfelt plea, this is an incident that the actor has made it very clear he wishes remain cloaked in obscurity and kept suppressed from being solved. Why this position, if his hands are completely clean of any involvement and there's no culpability on his part? His reasoning is yet unclear…. Maybe you can figure it out.
|
|
Note
to Publishers and Literary Agents: All Supporting documentation
and originals are available. For complete “Flights…” manuscript see:
Contact Leedee Ordering
Readers: E-book size for this
entire 5-part Celebrity Mystery is 65 pages. To order see: Purchase Works For Poetry-Art download |
“Wake-up
Call”All Reader Comments
are Welcome